As a parent, sometimes you wonder if dance is just a phase. You signed them up because they asked, you’ve bought the shoes and learned to do the bun, and somewhere in there you start watching for a sign that it stuck.
Most of the time, that sign shows up at home before it shows up in the studio. It’s the kid who’s still dancing when nobody’s watching, and who had a rough class and still wants to go back. We’ve watched a lot of children find it over the years, and the signs look surprisingly alike. Here are five we see again and again at Smartt Steps, and a few simple ways to support your dancer once you spot them.
How can I tell if my child really loves dance?
We hear it often from parents: “She likes it, but how do I know if it’s more than a phase?”
You don’t need a trained eye. Most of the signs show up in your kitchen and your car.
- They dance when nobody’s asking. The grocery store aisle, the kitchen while dinner’s cooking, the living room with the coffee table shoved out of the way. Kids who love it can’t keep it inside the studio. Over fall break this year, we received a video of a young dancer giving herself a ballet class, with her notebook open, ballet barre in the middle of the living room, fully dressed in class attire.
- They practice without a reminder. You’ve never had to say “go practice” the way you say “go brush your teeth.” You hear the same eight counts through the bedroom door, over and over, or hear them humming their song from across the room.
- The car ride home is a full report. What their teacher said, the step that finally clicked, who they stood next to at the barre. When school gets a one-word “fine” and dance gets twenty minutes of detail, that tells you something.
- A hard class doesn’t end it. Every dancer has a day when their balance feels off or the combination won’t stick. Sometimes there are tears. The sign is what happens the next week, when they want to go back and try again.
- They cheer for the dancer next to them. This one surprises parents. Kids who love dance tend to love the people they dance with. We once watched a group of teammates perform all of Hamilton in the living room for a fellow dancer who was recovering from surgery.
What if my child loves dance but isn’t the strongest in the class?
Then they’re right where they should be.
Love for dance and skill at dance rarely show up at the same time. It’s easy to pick up ideas from TV about what a dancer is supposed to look like at eight or ten or twelve, and then worry your child isn’t keeping up. Growth in a real studio is slower than that, and a lot more personal.
Miss Marye tells our dancers, “What matters is that you give your very best, every time you are here. That’s always a win!” We believe that for a six-year-old in her first ballet class and for a senior in the EDGE Company.
Is it too late if my child is only now finding dance?
Never!
Some children know at three. Others find it at ten, or at fifteen. One of our dancers came to us at thirteen after years of gymnastics, tried dance for the first time, and earned an Exceptional Growth Award by the end of her first year.
And love doesn’t always show up on day one. One mom told us about her three-year-old who cried at drop-off. That same three-year-old walked off the recital stage and said, “Mommy, I want to do five dances next year.”
What should I do once I see the signs?
Mostly, keep doing what you’re doing. You got them to class, and that’s the hard part. A few small things help from here:
- Ask them to teach you a step they learned in class. They love being the expert, and you’ll learn a lot about what they’re working on.
- Come watch when you can. Parent observation is one of our favorite times of the year, because you get to see what your dancer sees in the mirror every week.
- Let them try another style. A ballet dancer who’s curious about hip hop or tap is a dancer who wants more, and our recreational classes make it easy to explore.
- Talk with us if they keep asking for more. For some dancers the next step is adding a class. For others it’s auditioning for the EDGE Company, our competitive program. We’ll help you find the path that fits your child and your family’s schedule.
If you’re seeing these signs and your child hasn’t found a studio home yet, we’d love to welcome you to the Smartt Steps family. Register for a free trial class and see how it feels.
